Being Uncomfortable is What it’s All About
Growing in Allyship with the Latinx Community

When we aspire to be an ally to the Latinx community, we tend to follow certain paths that are well-traveled.

We go the extra mile to find the best organizations to donate to, make sure the books on our shelves are by minority authors, and send our kids to diverse schools. But none of these acts–while all good–directly address the segregation that plagues our communities.

What matters more–much more–is who we spend our time with. As individuals, parents, and leaders, it matters who we invite over to our houses for dinner, or who we schedule play dates with. It’s who our kids are hanging out with after school, and who they see us surrounding ourselves with that will move the needle of social change.

We invite you to take action to desegregate your social circles:

• Reflect. Do your social circles reflect your dedication to diversity and aspiration to be an ally to the Latino community?

• Walk the talk. If we are truly dedicated to learning Spanish and about Latino cultures, we should have Latinx friends in our social circles.

• Create a connection. Consider inviting a Latinx person you don’t know very well yet out for a cup of coffee.

• Be sincere. The meet-up isn’t meant to be an interview or a culture lesson. It’s an opportunity to genuinely get to know someone with a different background from your own. Approach the conversation like you would with any new friend.

• Be curious and open-minded. Challenge yourself not to make any assumptions. Remember that every individual has a completely unique identity, experience, and connection to their individual culture.

• Don’t force the Spanish. For reasons we have shared in previous newsletters, practicing Spanish in the community is tricky. If it isn’t clear to you that this person wants to speak in Spanish with you, sticking to English is more than fine!

• Lean into the discomfort. Recognize that putting yourself out there to make a connection outside of your regular social circle will likely be out of your comfort zone. We must embrace this feeling in order to make new connections and learn.

Aspiring to be an ally often stops when it starts to get uncomfortable, but being uncomfortable is what it’s all about!

Buying a book is comfortable. Putting yourself in a non-dominant position time and time again to create safe spaces for other people to share their experiences in the language that they feel most comfortable and consistently seeking to learn what changes they hope to see for their community–that is uncomfortable. These are the actions that are ultimately going to make you a stronger ally.

Afterall, we can’t be allies for the Latinx community if we don’t get to know the intricacies of the identities and stories of the Latinx people we are striving to support.

If we want a desegregated world, let’s start with who we invite to coffee.